Posted in Mental Health Struggles, Thinking Thoughts on a Thursday

Thinking Thoughts on a Thursday 12: Short sharp kick to the head

Hello there internet people, been a while since I’ve written anything personal.

I felt bad about this for a brief time, because whenever I have written more personal stuff, the response has been universally positive and supportive. It took me a while to real

ise that the reason I hadn’t written for a while was simply things were going better.

Work isn’t as bad as it has been.

The house is better, started decorating in fact.

Gym stuff is going better.

Weightloss is up and down, but will get back to doing Slimming World Saturday eventually.

The big thing though, is that I have taken it upon myself to wean off my anti-depressants. After speaking to my doctor, I went to one every other day, months have passed and I am now on two per week, for another two weeks, when I go to one per week, then maybe none per week. It’s all been going really positively, have dealt with my son a little better, feel closer to him and have been more open when talking with the MIGHTY Rosie and we’re communicating better than we ever have before. It’s all been really positive.

You can see where this is going can’t you?

I was due for a blip. Yesterday, it all got on top of me, the stress of work, the negative feelings, the low moods and anxiety and it all sort of fell on top of me all at once. Spent most of the afternoon experiencing a stretched out 4 hours anxiety attack. I’ll be honest, not fun. When I got home, I wasn’t in the mood for doing pretty much anything, but had to make a couple of calls, one of them to the MIGHTY Rosie, so that was a positive. I needed a win. So I decided to move the bed around and sort out the headboard. On my own, a large bed and a less than stellar frame of mind.

If you guessed it went badly, well done. I ended up putting my foot through part of the bed. This didn’t help my mood as you can imagine. So the true depth and extent of my stupidity was point out by the MIGHTY Rosie and after getting help with the bedroom furniture, we got stuff done. Two pictures hung up, two shelves and finally got my bedside shelves back up and was able to put my collectables and knick-knacks up.

Even got the DC Hardbacks lined up again, which was nice.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Overall I left for therapy in a far more positive mindspace than I could have, enabling me to sift through the feelings of the day and start today more positively.

I can’t thank my wife enough, sometimes I need a kind word, a hug, some positivity, but sometimes I need a kick up the arse. She can do all these things, I call her the MIGHTY Rosie, I do this for a reason.

We are more than our battles, every bad day is just that A bad day. Her helping me realise that, got me through last night and that has got me through today so far.

Thanks for listening,

TTFN

 

 

 

 

Author:

Liverpool based family man and unrepentant geek, trying to understand what's going on in my own head, which is not always being a good place to be. Remember always, we live in a world of wonders.

2 thoughts on “Thinking Thoughts on a Thursday 12: Short sharp kick to the head

  1. … and sometimes you need to put your foot through the bed … darling man … such a day you had … but glad today is better

    I am a bad girl as I go fast withdrawl. when I realise I no longer give a bugger – I stop. it’s horrid and dangerous and takes up to six months to stop the heart palpitations… but I need myself back x

    be well Dear dear man x

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